I've been in a funk for several days. And it's always a question of what came first?… Am I in a funk because my honey said some thing that hurt my feelings? Or did what he said hurt my feelings because I was in a funk ?? Am I in a funk because the weather has been so overcast and the sunshine so fleeting? Or is that just exacerbating my funk? In this funk I seek inspiration wherever I can find it! Doom scrolling is awfully tempting-and time consuming. But unfortunately, instead of inspiring me, it was bringing me down. And the realization that came to me was that I was taking on the burden of everyone else's dreams. I was feeling the weight of not accomplishing what they were inspired to do! Fortunately, I was able to catch myself and remind myself that I don't need to take on other peoples dreams, I can find inspiration in my own ! The funk tried to trap me, but I'm onto it's schemes ha ha! ... so… Whether we blame it on the weather, on the people around us, or what we ate, lol… It's OK to just allow the day to be a little blah. Because you know what? ...that won't last forever! And you still got amazingness in you that's just waiting to come back :-)
And here's the poem inspired by all this: (yes! I actually even found inspiration in the funk!)
CAUGHT UP
caught up
caught up in every one else’s dreams.
your farm
your cabinet
your outfit
your home
your resale
your great find
your lost dog
your roam
your tiny painting
your tiny house
your large muscles
your miraculous spouse
your homesteading
your money making
your ADHD
your vegan eating
none of these things
will make ME free
none of your dreams
we’re made for ME
the only way to find
a dream of MY kind
is to gift my time
into the wonders of MY mind
instead of depositing my wealth
of energy and health
into pining over
tickets already redeemed
raffles already won
I can reach for the sun
I can dance with the moon
I can kiss a million faces
I can celebrate Christmas in June
I can bring color to the masses
in ways so far unforeseen
I can juggle rainbow glasses
and cause a pulchritudinous scene
(it’s a great word! Look it up!)
I can grow old however I want
I can act young if I please
I can be idiot or savant
I can eradicate dirt in my kitchen
or play in it on my knees
I can nurture my garden
or someone else’s needs
I can do it all because
I can do it all in spite
I can make my dreams my own
No one can say they are wrong or right
so keep your dreams
Enjoy them mightily
While I cheer you on
I’ll trust my own dreams
to get along splendidly!
~buffy jo 5/30/23
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